Transformation is a whole process. While you'd think that as we grow older we'd know who we are. However, growing up and spending close to 45 years just letting people treat me like a human punching bag, coupled with plenty of bad decisions that I've made, has me at a point where I feel lost.
This morning I woke up with a piece of poetry in my heart that God gave me. Rest assured, I'm no poet and very rarely write poetry, which is why I'm certain this came from God...
When I look at the world and see all its strife, all I feel is sad.
When I look at my own life and see all the pain I've been through, all I feel is mad.
Lord why does it have to be this way?
I know You have the final say.
All You have to do is speak the word and it's done.
All You have to do is hold up Your hands and the battle is won.
That You have chosen for things to be this way,
I find myself waiting for Your final say.
Lord when will the time come when the battle is finally won?
Lord do I have to wait all my life?
Making my way through a life of strife...
Fighting the ultimate battle to be with You
And finally enjoy Heaven's view.
Lord I've had enough
Of this world and all its stuff.
I wish You'd call me home, into Heaven's door
Where I could worship You forevermore.
Yet here on Earth I will stay,
Until there comes a day
When the pain will go away
And in Heaven I will stay.
Lord fill me with Your peace.
I ask knowing that only You can release
the pain and longing of my sound
For it is You who makes me whole.