Ruby Hem Ministries

Being in a codependent relationship with your adult child Being in a Codependent Relationship with Your Adult Child... This is something I've recently concluded is an issue for me: My 18-year-old daughter and I are codependent. Up to this point I wouldn't have cared but let's dig deep here for a bit... Let's start by understanding what the term codependent actually means. Codependence is a complex pattern of excessive selflessness and preoccupation with another person that does not serve both people optimally. Codependency (or codependence, co-narcissism or inverted narcissism) is a tendency to behave in overly passive or excessively caretaking ways that negatively impact one's relationships and quality of life. - Wikipedia.org When you look at this definition you see that a codependent person is someone who is unable to function on their own. They depend on another person to help them think, process, and essentially live. In doing so they're essentially peopl

Learning how to Trust Your Therapist: Some Practical Tips

Finding a trauma-based therapist is an important first step in your healing journey. From there you must learn to trust the therapist you've chosen. After all, this is someone whom you'll be working collaboratively and cooperatively with them for therapy to work. Initially your therapist is a stranger to you. Since you're already feeling like life is against you, unknown people and situations may make you weary. Add to it the fact that your PTSD has shaped how you view other people and you may have some serious distortions to deal with. Here are some tips to help guide you in the right direction - that of trusting your therapist. Start by Rethinking Trust The easiest way to gain trust in your therapist is to focus on them. Initially you'll want to observe them from the outside where you feel safe. Learn to Trust Yourself First Check out this Bible study to help you learn to trust God & yourself! Unfortunately, at the heart of most client/therapist relationship pro

Tips for Finding the Right Trauma-Based Therapist

Not every therapist is going to be equipped to help you with your PTSD! PTSD in and of itself is a huge struggle. When you're stuck in an "incorrect" treatment modality you won't reach your goals. Unfortunately, this is something that's more common than you might think. When you're talking to a professional who doesn't have trauma training, you may do well for a while but eventually you'll grow worse. This is because when you spend a lot of time talking about trauma you can be retraumatized. It is why it's vital for you to work with the right PTSD professional - the most highly qualified person whom you can find in this regard. How to Choose the Right PTSD Therapist While anyone can tell you that they've worked with a lot of PTSD survivors, this doesn't mean a therapist is good at it or that they're truly equipped to guide you towards the healing you deserve. For this to make sense, you must understand that PTSD treatment and recovery i