Are you the type of person who finds it hard to sit down and rest? Instead, you find yourself trying to stay busy all the time.
I'm this person too. I struggle to sit still. Instead, I find things to always be doing.
There's just something in me that drives me to want to do so much more than I need to do. For instance, I know I'm at a point in my life when I can just relax, but for some reason, it's still so hard to do so. It can't just be me that does this though. In fact, I think that having a combination of PTSD and fibromyalgia may be a blessing. Don't get me wrong, it's still a struggle.
My Struggle with My Health Issues
At one point PTSD made me worry about everything - and I do mean everything. I was crippled by this anxiety. Eventually, with the right medications, it slid into the background and I was fine for a few months. I was able to be a busy bee doing a multitude of things every day. I was making plans and achieving goals. Then it hit me...
I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Now I'm constantly in pain. Of course, some days the pain is worse than others, but it's still there. I'm also struggling with pain in my tailbone. It's to the point I struggle to stand up or walk very far so my doctor decided to take some x-rays to see if she can help.
Now, this isn't meant to be a whoa is me post. I'm only telling you these things so you know that I can relate to what many of you are going through and how you're feeling.
My Blessings
I have had so many opportunities laid out in front of me lately. I'm watching doors open and some then shut again. For instance, I was planning on writing a book with a friend. Unfortunately, she isn't at a place where she can embrace this journey with me at the moment. I admit, I did feel a bit discouraged by this news but then God showed me something. He showed me that I'm strong enough to take this journey along, but in a different way. Instead, I've started creating a paid section for this blog. While I don't want to say much about it yet, it's going to be a very reasonably priced area in which there will be devotionals written for those who have PTSD, fibromyalgia, chronic pain, or any combination of these things.
As I mentioned earlier, I'm at a point where I don't need to work. However, a friend invited me to work with her at a writing company. I was ready to put my keyboard down and stop writing for everyone until she made me this offer. I accepted the offer because I felt God saying try it. Admittedly I went in tentatively thinking if I don't like it, I'll leave. However, this is yet another area in which God is blessing me. He's using this as an opportunity to teach me how to become a better writer.
A Closing Thought
God meets us where we are. He blesses us in ways that are very personal to us. For me, it's through my gift of writing. Although I'm really struggling with PTSD and fibromyalgia right now, He still chooses to bless me with opportunities.
While it's a challenge to let myself rest enough that I can take advantage of these opportunities, they're there for me - and they're there for you too. You may not believe this today but I challenge you to take a moment to ask God to show you His blessings in your life and what you're to do with them. He'll lead and guide you in the direction you should go - even if that means you're in a season of rest, preparing you for your calling.
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